Holy Bibble

The Contendings of Set and Horus


Horus rules over Egypt. Set doesn't like this, 'cause he's the villain of all the stories, so he challenges Horus. They then proceed to have battles and contests for eighty years or so.
The contests get pretty cray-cray. Such as that one time Set had sex with Horus, and horus caught Set's semen in his hand so as not to be impregnated by him... Then Isis puts Horus's semen in some lettuce, and feeds the lettuce to Set. When Set is like, "Look who dominated who!!" he's surprised to find out that HIS seed isn't in Horus, but Horus's seed is in HIM.
I didn't even make any of that up.
They also agreed to have a boat race with boats made out of stone. But Horus was crafty and made a wooden boat PAINTED like stone. Set was super surprised when his stone boat sunk. Then Horus was like, "Meep meep!" and ran off in a puff of smoke.
Eventually Set realizes what a feeb he is, and gives the throne up to Horus.